I’ve been looking over this architecture program prospectus from USC Cebu a lot lately, and I just don’t know how I feel about this at all. I want to stay where I am, yet my dad makes good points that I could potentially learn more if I went back with them to Cebu to finish architecture. I’d also be more challenged, he said, since there will be more competition (which I’m quite frankly okay with not having to deal with too much where I am now). It will also be a bigger university and that means a lot more people in one lecture; the lecturers’ attentions will be divided among more people and that would definitely affect the learning experience that I’ve sort of gotten used to here.
Granted, he did say that there will be a lot more to do there (in terms of modules I could take), and I wouldn’t need to worry about finances and accommodation, but just the mention of that has me feeling helpless as my independence will be taken away.
I want to stay where I am because I’m quite alright with the university experience I’m already getting here. Okay, maybe there are days — many days — where I question the university itself, but I like the people here. I also want to see things become better with—
Well, I see progress in the interactions, at the very least, and the hope alone keeps me going — staying, actually.
My heart is for Macau, but my mind is for Cebu.
Just thinking about all of this is draining. My brain juice is slowly seeping away again just obsessively thinking about this.
Mind, shut up. Please. I need to focus on some work.